Suffocating

She was racing through the bushes, bruising her legs and arms. It was all dark, but she knew her way. She ran as fast as her legs could take her. Someone was following her. Trying to seize her. The thought of being caught was suffocating her and it made her mind and legs go numb. The more she thought of being caught, the slower she got. The shadow following her was now getting closer. She tried to run faster but all she could think of was getting caught. The stranger’s hands touched her and her whole body shivered and went numb. And her eyes caught the daylight. She sat up on the bed with a jerk. She had woken up from a nightmare.

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The cousin

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Today’s my birthday. But honestly I had expected nothing more than phone calls and messages. She called me at 11:40 and said she wanted to be the first one to wish so she’s gonna bore me for another 20 minutes. However, as I told her about boring vacations, at 11:55 she said, “Open the door, and I swear you won’t be bored anymore.” Yes, she was there. All the way from ahmedabad. Brought me cake and gifts and every member in the house was just as shocked as I was.

Beginning with her description, she is always my savoir. Be it boring vacations or trouble with friends or boyfriend… She was always there. And the best part that I like about us is not that she’s always there for me, well I do like that but, the best part is our talks. We never were the sleeping type when she came. Honestly, I was that type. I was a early to bed and early to rise type. But that’s the part I loved about vacations. I was always excited about vacations because of her.

That’s one of the weakness of human mind that most of the childhood memories come back as dreams and always in pieces. However, all those pieces are so beautiful and idiotic, they make us believe that childhood was fun. We share some great memories together.

She mostly used to arrive here in the morning. Early morning. And used to wake me up. She always brought something for me. Always had a small or large gift, be it clothes or cosmetics or small toys or books ( Maybe I did like her gifts more that’s why the first question I asked her was what did u bring me this time. ) We both had similar interests. She is a year younger than me. She used to bring all new stuff and toys she bought in the whole year to show me.

Other thing that we loved, ( However embarrassing we feel to recall it now ) is that we used bath together. Well, we did like it. Taking a shower together now seems to be so weird we keep laughing at ourselves while recalling that.

We always had the best bonding among all other cousins. Her elder sister and brother also used to come. And two cousin brothers from Bhavnagar and one if my cousin brother living here. We also had an Australian cousin. And she was always our target. We were really rude to her which now we do feel bad about. She had round spectacles with a white frame. And two braids. She never did anything wrong I guess but we did not like her. All of the cousins used to be divided in two groups and use to play WWF. And our team always won. Me and her never actually took part in the fight but used to cheer the bigger ones.

Then I also remember playing CID. As we both were smaller than the others, we always played the role of corpses. We were never given the major roles but still we enjoyed the game more than others.

The best memory I have with her is not sleeping the whole night. We used to wake up in the middle of the night and make cards for everyone. Colours and paper was something we still share in common. We of course did not sleep with parents how much so ever they insisted. Late night snacks, playing UNO, making cards, mocking the other cousins, fights, playing with her toy houses and of course our baths is all I have as our childhood memories.

Change is the way of life. We did change. But change has only made us stronger. We now have our new memories like getting madness attacks in the middle of the night and dancing in “chumma chumma”. Still our midnight munchings are the same. Talking like adults. Talking about life and Indian parents and practicality of life and all the happning things. We share mostly everything. It’s not that we meet everyday, but whenever we meet, we join all the pieces where we left.

And the Pic. Well we have many grown up pics but this one’s still the best. I hope to cherish our relationship in the coming years and love her more than I do now.

Fear

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Something is out there. Chasing you day and night. And there is no way it’s gonna leave you. It’s gonna be with you to harass you for the rest of your life. And you know what it is? Fear.

Be it Darkness, Ghosts, Animals, Magic, Exams or Believes, It’s always coming for you. The moment you think you escaped, it’s gonna be ahead of you and come and boom you in your face.

However, the fact is that FEAR is a soul without a body. And in order to function, it requires a body which is why it enters into your mind. Your mind loves his new buddy so much that they constantly manipulate you, making you question at each and every stage about what’s next.

So from this, it’s quite obvious that the only person to help you get rid of you is you yourself. And for that the basic thing you need to get inside your head is that it only exists in your brain.

So, you think you can win the battle?

Nahh…I don’t think so. Because fear has till now not only got inside ur mind, it’s inside ur soul. And you are a victim of an incurable disease. So enjoy the left days.